According to Fray: Lacoste

8 Jul

Building on my last summer do not post concerning the hideouskly disturbing trend of bathing suits as shorts- let me initiate some ‘crocodile’ tears from our fellow fan of the reptile we once called our go-to-Prep-best: Lacoste.

Maybe it was ok to sport the pique polo back in ’04, when Juicy was the shit to rock, and girls wore UGGS in the summer. Alas, the latter and former trends are now property of the ghettolicious girls, guidas,  baby-mamas, and for the UGGS, well, Lesbians and assholes to be quite honest (never wear UGGS with your work out clothes 12 year old Westmount tween- you look like a moron, and we all know your feet are sweating rivers).

Lacoste is over, and working at a boutique directly in front of a Lacoste store is sometimes simply infuriating. Lacoste went from tennis wear, to Jappy Prep, (which these ‘bathing suits as shorts boys’ love to pair with their O’Neil suits). Unless you’re on the court at Wimbledon, please refrain from sporting the croc- the label whore phase is over, and quite frankly, stylish people of 2011 could give 2 crocodile shits what Floridian swamp reptile is on your polo. It’s just not important anymore.

What I do have beef with however, is the knock-off atrocities you bitches seem to be pulling on your handbags. More on this to come (Yes, lady in the LCLCLCLCLC bag- you best know we know that ain’t no true Lou)

So gentleman, spend the 90$ elsewhere, like on big boy clothes, beacuse Lacoste is whack and tack on the streets (and so are their shoes. TAKE THEM OFF. This isn’t Grade 8 at a private school…)

Croc,

Fray x

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